Well, it seems that I have outdone myself yet again in the dating department. Last night I hung out with a cute boy that I have hung out with several times before. It's nothing too serious... but we see each other every once and a while and we like each other and we're pretty close and he's cute and we are both idiots. We had a really nice night together. We had some dinner, watched a movie, and then we went back to my place for a drink and to watch the latest episode of SNL. When we went back to my place, I plopped onto the couch with my Makers Mark in hand, and finally took my shoes off for the first time all day. Time to relax!
We were watching Justin Timberlake sing his cute little face off when out of the blue he casually asked me when the last time I had my period was. I thought it was a little random, and wasn't sure why we asked, but I didn't think it was anything too out of the ordinary. Then just as Justin Timberlake came on screen wearing a huge piece of tofu as a costume, he looked at me and said,
"Hey. You smell different today. What did you eat for lunch?"
"Well, we just had Mexican food so maybe that's it? Wait, do I have bad breath?"
"No, it's not the Mexican, I smelled it when we first met up. Did you eat anything different today?"
"Well, I had half of a Subway sandwich someone bought me at work. It had a lot of vegetables in it."
"No, that's not it."
I started to try to smell my own breath.
"I can't smell anything! Do I have bad breath?!"
"It's not bad.... it's hormonal. It's... pregnant breath"
I pressed pause because:
A. I was in shock, and
B. Because I love Justin Timberlake and I love Tofu, and they are both delicious and both things were on screen at the moment and I didn't know the next time in my life time that that would happen again.
"Excuse me?" I said.
"You have pregnant breath. That's why I asked when the last time you had your period was. You have pregnant breath. It's not bad.... it's just... pregnant"
And then a mouse came out from under the couch cushion and climbed up his back and he left my apartment.